NFTNIF Volume 2 - Episode 2 - Kks3 The dwarf galaxy.

Report from Kks3 - Stardate January 26, 2015

Events have moved quickly in the Ralphee Way Galaxy.

This is an old galaxy, with a society many billions of years old. 

They have seen and done it all - until they were "discovered" 

by Earth astronomy and I "claimed" the galaxy. Having 

proclaimed myself as ruler of this volume of Creation, neither I,

 nor they, had any idea what we were getting into.

FAQs

"How can you even get there it's so far away?"

Distance is nothing compared to the power of the human mind. 

 I travel there using a technique known as "extra-corporeal 

excursion". I manifest an avatar anywhere I like in Kks3, and 

interact with them on that basis.

"How can you even communicate with them?"

Again, the power of the human mind transcends this small

 barrier. I communicate with them via a "Mediated 

Transcognitive Interface", a mental technique anyone can learn

 if they apply themselves. Of course the fact that most of the 

Kks3 entities are much more evolved than we are makes it 

childishly simple.

"What authority has legitimized your claim?"

The peoples of Kks3 themselves, after an exciting interlude of 

debate, have accepted me as their ruler, and ratified my choice

 of successor. It was their first election in 28 turnings of the 

galaxy, and everyone was very enthused to vote. It was a 

straight-up yes or no - and I carried 83.7% of the vote.

"Are you crazy?"

 I am not qualified to make a final judgement on that - and 

neither are most of you.

First, let me admit that my throne is based more on the novelty 

of it than anything else. That a primitive microbe like myself, 

with what they admit is great deal of potential, should excurse 

to them and boldly claim to be their new ruler was something 

that had never happened before. They are stimulated by 

novelty and everyone decided to go along with it.

Not that there weren't a few swerves of the celestial surrey on

 the way to the throne. In fact, there was no throne but they are

 whizzes are building beautiful things in a hurry.

It only took about subjective 3 minutes for almost every entity

 in Kks3 to be aware of me. It was like going on every network,

 Twitter, Facebook and live streaming feed all at once. Public

 speaking is one of my strengths, and I unleashed the full power

 of my charisma in this, my most important public appearance. 

 The entertainment "industry" of Kks3 embraced me as their 

darling immediately. Their sociologists and biologists also

 wanted a chance to check me out. It looked like I was going to 

put together a majority pretty easily.

The first swerve of my political surrey was when I introduced 

the idea of a successor. They have all been immortal so long 

 that they took an unreasonably long time to understand that I 

am not immortal, and that I got to name the next ruler.

This acted for and against me in my campaign. For - how bad

 can it be if he is going to die in such a short time? Against - 

who is this "successor?" How can they agree to it without

 knowing anything about him?

I told them that I would revisit that issue later once they had a 

chance to get to know me and Lucas better. That show of 

flexibility after my strong presentation earlier resolved some of

 their fears.

Then I made that favorite mistake of political aspirants 

everywhere, and opened my big mouth. Since we are having 

frightening problems with police/community relations here in

 the USA, I asked them how they managed policing.

They require very little policing - almost none of it crime

related. Police are chosen by lottery - serve for one revolution 

of their local nexus (whether a planet, gas cluster, or whatever 

they use as their local environment) and then they don't have to

 do it again until everyone else has taken a turn. Only 1 in 

approximately 1 billion of them has police duties.

They wanted to know about our methods, and when I explained

 and offered them a summary with visuals, a true shockwave 

rocked their collective mind.

For what is to them a very long time - almost 10 minutes, I was 

sidelined like a child standing to the side in a stadium full of 

everyone shouting at once. I could follow only the most basic

 concepts of their debate - that I was from such a barbaric

 culture that I could only contaminate them once the 

entertainment value had worn off.

The other main thread of the debate was that I seemed to be 

basically a decent entity, that they in fact could possibly

 influence our culture positively, and that it seemed far more 

likely that they would have a beneficial effect on us than I 

would have a negative effect on them.

It was a very near thing, and I was allowed to make a statement

 before they voted.

I told them that I would learn everything I could from them 

and promised to rule them as wisely as they would allow me to. 

 They asked if I would swear as solemnly to carry the lessons I

 learned back to Earth.

I agreed.

It was with a thrilling chorus of Love, free of the limitations of 

a flesh wrapper that they acclaimed me "Ralphius Rex". Next 

Episode - the Coronation!